Torn Feelings and the Child of Divorce

Wayne Stocks —  In Emotional Impacts October 10, 2012 — 1 Comment

Welcome back to our series on dealing with the emotional impacts of divorce on children. Thus far, we have looked at:

Most children of divorce begin a pattern of traveling back and forth between two houses – two families – two lives.  They are never fully present in either place as they wonder what they are missing at the other home.  They are on constant alert not to offend one parent by talking about the other.  In the end, they end up feeling torn in two.

At Divorce Ministry 4 Kids, we have put together the following one page infographic on helping children of divorce deal with feeling torn as a result of the divorce of their parents (click on the picture below for a full sized pdf version of the pamphlet). Please feel free to share this pamphlet with parents and others who work with children of divorce.

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Nancy Purdy says:

“Torn” also needs to include one parent pressuring the child to tear away from the other parent. The child feels obligated to show that parent loyalty, otherwise the child feels he/she will lose that parent if they don’t take that parent’s side…..the less pressuring parent initially “loses” the child – hoping that one day the child will not be torn like that…..
(hope that makes sense…..)